|
  |
|
|
What is Love?
By Marlene Kaiser of Kaiser Distributing
I just screened an intel about a bear, I enjoyed it and she put it up because there wasn't anything to screen, so I'm following in her footsteps. I thought I was through with love week. Well, I have been pondering love this week, and I have another thing to say about it, so I decided oh what the heck I'll again make a fool of myself trying to make sense of love. All emotions are on a continuum. Sad ----- Glad, despair to Happy, and so on, it is pretty easy to make a list of most of them, but the continuum that controls us the most and creates the most problems is the continuum that includes love ----------- hate, or hate ---------- love. Most of our very personal relationships exist on either end of this spectrum, and that is where the problems exist. The emotions on this continuum are the most powerful that we have, and the most definitive or elusive depending on how you look at it. What do I mean by that? Sometimes we have both feelings toward something or someone. That is a love hate relationship and often crops up in marriages, close friendships and where ever people are in close contact or deal with each other. What most people forget is that there is a middle on this spectrum, that is where you have no feelings either way toward a particular action of the other person. You can still like that person, in some cases love them deeply, but they no longer push your buttons and send you to the other end. You are able to maintain a neutrality in most of your
dealings. This can be a long time coming in a marriage, and in some never. In our marriage, we agreed to disagree about a number of items,early in our marriage, and can comfortably allow the other to have their opinions, and even support their opinions when necessary. This is total neutral ground. Yet we each maintain our sovereignty in that area. Agreeing to disagree helps when there are several big areas of differences. As long as there are other balancing factors, the relationship works. Surprisingly, it is the small things that create most of the problems. For instance, my husband rarely ever puts a cap back on anything, and this annoys me terribly if I let it. Sometimes I think 55 years is long enough to put up with that, but then I think it would be a shame to throw it all away for something so trivial, so I put the caps on, if I can find them. I might gripe, and then he will put the caps on stuff for a while, but is soon back to his old self.
I love him anyway, and there is too much laughter and joy with his marvelous sense of humor, his consideration for most of my needs, and the fact that I do some things that drive him to distraction, and he doesn't say much about them, that's what keeps us going. When considering a divorce,it is essential to a successful resolution to come to the neutral point. As long as you either love or hate the individual, you are controlled by those feelings. And, what many marriage partners don't understand or believe is that as long as either one of the emotions is running the show, you can get help and resolve the differences. If you feel nothing about the other person, that is when you choose to get a divorce. There isn't anything to build on. You would have to come to some realization that this other person has enough of what you want that you can try again to build love. This happens sometimes, but once one partner has reached that point, then it is harder to reconcile. Sometimes forgiveness helps, but more often than not, when love is gone forgiveness has to follow to remain completely neutral.
|
Contributor's Note
If you agree with me that congress should sacrifice 10% of their salary, please go to my petition at
http://www.change.org/petitions/ask-congress-to-cut-their-pay-to-help-the-deficit
A representative put an amendment up to a vote that they cut $22 billion out of the congressional budget, and it was voted down. I put my petition in first, but now I'm supporting him.
|
|
Our Watkins Store
 |  | sheilamarie liked this intel. Feb 20, 2011 | | | oxytum admired this intel. Feb 20, 2011 | | | appreciated this intel. Feb 21, 2011 |
Please login or sign up to rate this intel.
Please login or sign up to add a comment.
The copyright for this content entitled "What is Love?" has been specified by the contributor as:
Creative Commons Attribution 3.0
Details 
This content may be copied, distributed, or modified as long as the original author is acknowledged with a link back to the content page.
If you use this content according to the license specified, you must link to the following URL:
http://rgkmzk.qondio.com/
|
|
May, 2012
2008
January, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, October, November, December
2009
January, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, October, November, December
2010
January, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, October, November, December
2011
January, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, October, November, December
2012
January, February, March, April, May
|
|
Not a member yet?
Qondio is a powerful network for making it online. If you have a website to
promote, we can help.
Sign up and get in on the action.
|
|
Welcome to Qondio! Discover the awesome power this network can deliver by going to our About page. Or you could skip straight to the Sign Up form.
|
|
